Hot for Teacher

Song by Van Halen

"Hot for Teacher" is a song on Van Halen's album, 1984. The sexually suggestive song was best known for its long opening drum solo, near motorcycle-like drum fills and its music video featuring the band as both adults and young students in a high school. The PMRC protested it, calling for it to be pulled from both the radio and television, due to the song's sexually suggestive lyrics referring to sex with a teacher, and a beautiful female teacher stripping in the video, among other issues.

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  • You return to bed with the wet tea bags and check the clock so you can time the prescribed ten minutes. You’re not as anal-retentive as your roomie, who has set at least three separate alarm clocks for tomorrow morning. You rest in bed and place the tea bags on your closed eyes. You do a few deep yoga breaths and mentally exercise “positive visualization.” You visualize yourself in the opening dance routine, and banish all thoughts of stumbling down the moving staircase. You see yourself nailing your talent performance, a kick-ass rendition of Van Halen’s “Hot for Teacher” on the electric guitar. Just as you are drifting off, you dream of walking down the catwalk with your arms full of roses, a tiara on your head, and a massive check bulging in your bank account.

    Lilla Zuckerman and Nora ZuckermanBeauty Queen Blowout

From This Book

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  • Beauty Queen Blowout

    2010
    Lilla Zuckerman and Nora Zuckerman

  • Losing It

    2008
    Valerie Bertinelli

  • Fargo Rock City

    2007
    Chuck Klosterman

  • The Wake-Up

    2005
    Robert Ferrigno

  • Goodnight Tweetheart

    2010
    Teresa Medeiros

  • American Rhapsody

    2000
    Joe Eszterhas

  • Chuck Klosterman IV

    2006
    Chuck Klosterman

  • Queen Takes King

    2009
    Gigi Levangie Grazer

  • Shut Up and Give Me the Mic

    2012
    Dee Snider

  • Broken Prey

    #16 of 23 (2005)
    John Sandford

  • Diary of a Player

    2011
    Brad Paisley and David Wild

  • Teeth of Beasts (Skinners)

    2010
    Marcus Pelegrimas

  • Hold Back the Dark

    2009
    Eileen Carr


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